What Is and What Should Never Be
by Shiny Ryuichi Sakuma
Summary: SlashYaoi. Yusuke must decide between the love of a woman that barely understands him or a prince that knows him better than he knows himself. Kurama must either choose the love and old friend or the love a demon that may or may not reciprocate his love.


Title: What is and What Should Never Be

Disclaimers: I do not own the rights to the song, Led Zeppelin does and I also do not own Yuu Yuu Hakusho

Warnings: Male x Male

Summary: Yusuke must decide between the love of a woman that barely understands him and a prince that understands him better than he does himself. Kurama must choose between the love of an old friend or the love a demon that may or may not reciprocate his feelings.

Rating on this site: Hmm, probably an extremely high PG-13, heheheh.... J

Rating on : NC-17 and on 

Chapter One

"Yusuke-san?" The aforementioned young man snapped from his semi-trance that the blowing cherry trees and radiant sun had forced upon him. Yusuke's dark eyes slid towards the prince of Reikai. "I had thought that you would forget our appointment this afternoon. Instead of doing your Reikai Tantei duties, you're dozing without a care in the world! What if a demon had slipped through the delicate- What's so funny?" Koenma glared at Yusuke.

Yusuke's chuckles gradually lessened. "You look ridiculous." He indicated the headband that covered the reputedly silly Junior symbol and the much too many layers of clothing for the stifling July heat. "Your hair can more than enough take care of that stupid sign." To all innocent bystanders, Koenma appeared to be a human. Only upon closer inspection did you realize that Koenma was far from being a mere mortal. The haunting color of his eyes; a clear amber that changed hues depending on his mood. The lovely tresses of chestnut that gently clipped his feminine jaw-line. A frame that supported enough muscle and litheness to add interest. Yusuke had to admit, not many humans were that attractive. Of course, he observed from only an aesthetic point-of-view.

"I'm not going to take that risk. Humans may not know what I look like but there are demon's in Japan that would recognize me." He touched the band around his head. "I don't really like hiding myself either but it's important I do so. As for the clothing, I cannot feel heat or cold."

"Yeah but you look like you're ready to go snowboarding down Mount Fuji. It's the middle of summer. You need to learn to relax a little. Come on, you're about the same size as Kurama. I'm sure he wouldn't mind lending you clothes." Yusuke rose to his feet, ignoring the gob-smacked expression on Koenma's visage. "Well, are you coming or am I leaving you here by yourself. Gods knows how long you'd last on your own."

Koenma frowned, falling into step beside Yusuke. "You're being more of a brat than usual. Did you and Keiko-chan have a fight? Let me guess, you're not going to tell me about because it's not my business? In case you've forgotten, you've died for me and I've nearly died for you as well. I think we can discuss our personal lives without being embarrassed."

"You talk too much." Yusuke laughed, clapping Koenma heartily on the back, nearly knocking the prince onto his face. "Yea, we had a fight. Nothing new. Same old shit. She wants to start a family and I don't. You'd think she'd be a little patient considering all that's been said and done. She just doesn't understand my life now. I'm not the Yusuke that she fell in love with. I'm a member of the Demon Nation. I'm not about to give that life up. I couldn't bring Keiko and my family to Makai. They'd be eaten alive the second I left them alone. I have too many enemies there. I can't stay in Nigenkai either because of my responsibility as one of your Reikai Tantei. A contract that's binding until death, or so I'm told. I don't know what to do and to be honest, I really don't care what she does. She can leave if she wants. I'm only going to break her heart, if I haven't done that already. All I can give her is pain. Yet, I do love her. I always have. You can't just throw those feelings away."

Koenma was taken aback by how candidly Yusuke was discussing his and Keiko's relationship. He'd never done that before. "Well, you have to do what your heart tells you to. If you think you and Keiko have a chance for a happily ever after than I say go for it and take my blessings with you but have you actually considered what you being a demon now entails? You'll live thousands of years. Keiko will probably live another sixty if she's lucky. Do you really want to watch her grow old and die? And what about your children? To be cursed with the demon blood, to only know sorrow and hate their entire lives? To be considered freaks among their peers? They'll be social outcasts and will more than likely join you in Makai before ever submitting to the simplistic human life."

Yusuke snorted. "You sound like you want me to end things with Keiko." Had Yusuke been looking at Koenma, he would have noticed an odd, feral gleam in Koenma's eyes. A yearning buried underneath years of a strong fortitude. "Ne, do you, Koenma? You aren't concerned about Keiko or my future kids. With you, there's always some hidden motive."

"No, there isn't. I just want you think about what I said."

Rolling his eyes, Yusuke shoved his hands in his pockets. "Fine. I will. Now, since I've told you all about my personal problems, mind telling me about yours?" Koenma's mouth opened but no words escaped. "Cat got your tongue, ne? I'm not blind. The others might not notice but I _know_ you. There's something wadding your panties into a bunch. Might as well tell me rather than Botan or Kurama."

Koenma sighed. "Does it really matter? I've learned to deal with my problems on my own. I always have. I don't intend to stop anytime soon either." To be honest, Koenma was terrified of admitting the truth for fear of being laughed at. Yusuke was the type of man to do that.

"Small wonder why you're so messed up. Tell me, Koenma. It's not right to keep things inside all the time. Release them. I'm waiting."

"I'm lonely," Koenma whispered, pausing in the middle of the street. Yusuke stared at the prince quizzically. Had he heard right? Immediately the protective role of being a Reikai Tantei settled in, honed in on keeping his prince safe. He moved towards Koenma, only to be thwarted by a wave of Koenma's hand. "Don't mock me, Yusuke. How can the great Koenma be lonely when he has callers day and night? Is that what you're thinking?"

"No. I'm thinking how the great Koenma can let something as stupid as loneliness hurt him?" Yusuke sank down onto a bench, motioning Koenma to join him. "Everyone deals with loneliness. It's a natural part of life. You can't let it beat you down or you'll be depressed for a long ass time. Trust me, I know."

"I've been alone for nearly three hundred years, Yusuke. I think I have more than a little reason to complain."

"Oh." Yusuke placed a hand on Koenma's shoulder, Honey meeting Licorice. "Look, you can wallow in your own self-pity or do something about it. You're a handsome guy, girls must drool when seeing you."

"I don't like females, Yusuke." Koenma's eyes widened as he grasped what he'd just admitted. He hadn't told anyone that, _ever_. He was too ashamed of his sexuality. It was common among demon's but, Koenma felt guilty for his fantasies involving a few of his close friends.

"Ah, you like guys then?" Yusuke inquired nonchalantly, inside his stomach was doing cartwheels. Was it disgust, elation, confusion? He couldn't pinpoint the exact feelings but he ruled out the first one. If he was disgusted by homosexuality then seven of his friends would immediately be dropped. "Alright, then, find yourself a guy to make you happy. Kurama's free. Wait, no, he's chasing Hiei....or is Youmi? Or was it Youko Kurama that's chasing them and human Kurama's single?" Rubbing his lips thoughtfully with his tongue, he puzzled himself. "But, aren't Youko and Kurama the same being, just with different mentalities and features? Whatever. Okay, so not Kurama. What about Jinn or Touya?"

Koenma blinked rapidly. "You're not bothered by my being gay?"

"From where I come from, you're the cover boy for ever yaoi doujin in the world. Thousands would drop to their knees for a chance to suck you off." Yusuke winked suggestively. "Though, for you, not any person will do to being your lover. They have to match you personality wise, be able to put up with your whining, your baby form, your annoying habits like the way you pucker your lips when you're thinking hard about something or how you flick your hair behind your ears when you're being extra sly and cunning, your bossy attitude that would put the most hardcore BDSM guru to shame-"

"That's enough, Yusuke!" Koenma shook his head wearily. "My gods, Yusuke, you're either observant or you've been around me too long!"

Yusuke smiled, resting his arms behind his head. The wind blew his haphazard locks jaggedly, blossoms from a magnolia tree drifting overhead of him and Koenma. "I tend to notice things about you." Yusuke shrugged. "I guess, that makes me weird. You don't spend nearly every day for seven years with someone and not notice the odd quirks your closest friend makes."

"I'm flattered you notice me." Koenma cursed the tell-tale blush that mantled his cheeks. "Well, not in _that_ way of course but, you know what I mean. If you did notice me in _that_ way, I'd be okay with it. I don't think you do so-"

"Another annoying habit. You babble incessantly." Yusuke slid closer to Koenma, their bodies nearly touching. Yusuke's voice lowered. "I'll tell you my own secret. I've wanted to experiment batting with the other side, if you get my meaning. Ever since I was resurrected, I've had these insatiable lusts to just fuck everything powerful and attractive that moves." Grinning, Yusuke's disposition started to alter. "Right now, you can probably smell how aroused I am to be in your presence. It's because you're so goddamn gorgeous and the power just drips from you and fuck, it makes me horny as hell. I could fuck you right now and not give a damn about the consequences. I want to use you, to pound into you until I suck every bit of that energy from you." Yusuke's eyes glowed red, tongue licking erotically at his elongated canines. A smile curled his lips so tenderly that Koenma had to do a double take as he became the human Yusuke again. "But I wouldn't do that to you. I won't deny I've imagined it when I'm alone at night. I'm not going to hurt you and right now, that's all I could do, would be to hurt you. I don't think I could live with myself if I did. Not with what Sensui did to you."

Koenma winced at the name of his old Reikai Tantei, the one who'd abused him mentally and raped him physically. "What if I wanted it, Yusuke? Would you still not give into it?"

"No. You could beg me for all you're worth and I wouldn't lay a hand on you. I might be a bastard but when I commit to someone, I give it my all; body, heart and soul. That doesn't exclude you just because of how unbelievably powerful you are. Sensui sensed that power deep inside of you and he used the only thing he knew to force that power from you; by being stronger than you. By making you believe that he loved you and once you'd let those guards down, he moved in, hunting you like prey. I'm not him, Koenma. We might be alike but I'll never hurt you."

Koenma murmured, almost afraid of Yusuke's admissions, "You're hurting me right now. You said you wanted me, that you lusted after me. It's more than I could have ever hoped for. I want you Yusuke-"

Yusuke pressed his finger to Koenma's lips. "I don't want it being about mutual sexual gratification. Should Keiko and I decide to call it quits, I will then bind my entire being to you and to making you happy."

"Another sixty years, ne? It shouldn't be too hard to wait that long."

"It might be sooner. Sooner than you think, anyway." Yusuke stood, pulling Koenma up to his feet. "We really have to find you some new clothes. You look dumb. Kurama's ki is at his apartment. He should be expecting us," Yusuke said, changing the subject, letting Koenma know it was closed.

"Right. I'd hate to embarrass you with my gaudy clothes." Snickering, Koenma buffeted Yusuke neatly on the head before running off towards Kurama's apartment building, feeling more light-hearted than he had in many decades.

Commencement End

.....Oooh, a sex romp fic?! From me? NEVER! Buwuwuwuhhaha. Drop me a line, please. Too much sexual innuendo? J _Never! _


End file.
